I want to share a student story with you. She has been working hard and smart with one goal in mind – Success! Earning her PHD has presented more problems than most people could survive. This student came to the states with very little. Despite lack of funding, networking opportunities, family support and being an international student, she was able to fulfill her dreams of getting a great education. Adversity has reared its ugly head so often in so many ways, and all I can do is advocate on her behalf and enjoy her passion for success. She recently reached out with news, good and bad. My response:
Always GREAT to hear your voice. On one hand you have great news (your PHD) and on the other – Not so great news (housing).
I have been with you in one form or another on this ride for a long time and have seen your ups and downs and have always been in awe of how you have managed it. Despite what you may feel/believe, you have accomplished so much. Not just as a student but as a person. Personal growth is so valuable in life. It feeds into all we do. It adds fuel to our lives and helps professional growth as well. This MUST be a key takeaway for you. When all of this is over, you will reflect and remember what you have accomplished and you will lean into your EXPERIENCE and know that you can do anything you put your mind to. It will all be floating in your memory bank to utilize as a tool to help others…as well as yourself. I had my career ending eye surgery in 2007. 19 years ago, I began a new journey in my 50’s no less and found it within myself to successfully reinvent and get hired in my 60’s at SBU. One of the top research universities in the world. I often ask myself, ‘how the hell did I do that?’. The same way you are managing. Hard work, commitment, perseverance, patience, putting up with all kinds of BS. Tenacity can drive us a long way. I am speaking from experience and know what I am saying. My advice is based on hard work and real time experience. You will come out of all of this in an extraordinary way. I know that about you. You have done everything right. You have been smacked in the head a million times with adversity of all shapes and sizes and despite it, you are still standing, moving forward, checking the boxes and seeing some daylight. How cool is that? Be proud. Be very proud. You have earned that. As your career coach and mentor, I am proud of you. I am not minimizing your housing issues. They are a real drag and in time you will work that out as well. Do you know how I know that? Because you have done it time and time again. You got this. Just take a deep breath and take it one step at a time. Life can be funny and it can be painful. Your experience with the pain makes you strong. it makes you whole. It allows you the opportunity to grow. It will provide an extraordinary story to tell. It will make you GREAT at whatever you choose to do.
Please keep me posted. Here if you need.
Best.
Jimmy
